May 2013
psilentasincjelli:
If I ever tell you I’m going to sleep and then you see me posting or liking things online for about an hour immediately after that, I promise I wasn’t lying to you, I’m just bad at going to sleep and it is usually a long process that begins with disengaging from any sort of immediate contact with people (chats, for example) and ends when everything on my screen is blurry and...
br000t:
se4h4ven:
toxic-ponies:
how are middle schoolers sexually active I wasn’t even socially active
I’m still not socially active
I’m not even active
1950's lyrics: Love me tender, love me true, all my dreams fulfilled. For, my darling, I love you, and I always will.
1960's lyrics: When the girl in your arms is the girl in your heart, then you've got everything.
1970's lyrics: I hope you don't mind that I put down in words, how wonderful life is while you're in the world.
2012 lyrics: Almost drowned in her pussy so I swam to her butt.
ianthe:
schmergo:
ianthe:
nothing grape flavored is flavored like grapes it’s just flavored like other grape flavored things and this is why I have trust issues
FUN FACT: Grape artificial flavor was the first artificial flavor created, by accident. That means that some guy decided, “Whoa, this smells a lot like grapes,” and now everyone pretends it’s grape-y, too…
It tastes like an...
satans-fabulous-blog:
morphingly:
brightredkettle:
are you the SAT because i’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes
with a ten minute break halfway through for snacks
That’s the most reasonable pick up line I’ve ever heard. You’re hired.
readalot413:
liverpate:
azraeldoesnotdispute:
liverpate:
why am i not a banana
Because your genetic code dictates that you are human. However, it should please you to know that you share 50 - 60% of your DNA with a banana.
thanks man
are you telling me that some people are 10% more banana than other people
selfdoubtandsyphilis:
dankestrnemes:
do animals think in english or in the sounds they make
this is what yahoo paid $1.1 billion for
stridersquad:
richwhitelesbian:
we need some new and more powerful swears
petparent:
Too bad you can’t get abs from laughing at your own jokes, because I would have an 8 pack
people: so what kind of music do you like?
me: ugh it's not that simple
yugoslavic:
i had no idea this site cost 1.1 billion i bet its because of my blog
the 5 stages of tumblr
stage 1: you will understand nothing, "wtf is this" will be a reoccurring thought
stage 2: once you kind of get the hang of it, you will be on constantly and obsess over followers, even though your blog is probably still shit
stage 3: probably the shortest of all the stages, you will get bored of tumblr for a while and go out in the "real world".
stage 4: you realize how addicting tumblr really is and how foolish you were to believe you could just leave
stage 5: tumblr becomes your life support. this stage never ends.
3 tags
Finally watched the series finale of the office. Even though I will most likely go into a deep depression now that its over, that was definitely the perfect ending to a wonderful show.
shessosumptuous:
So homosexuality is a sin but high heeled sneakers aren’t
heygloria:
nothing hurts more than being ignored by cats on the street
4 tags
thats-slightly-raven:
My milkshakes bring all the boys to the yard. GRAVEyard hahaha enjoy that cyanide milkshake you piece of shit.
k1mkardashian:
i think i’m having a mid life crisis and i’m not even 21
wxng:
Reasons to Date Me:
No one will ever try to steal me away from you.
Sometimes I’m funny.
That’s all i have
Anonymous asked: 1... Only, I'm a girl, so that's interesting...
golden-sexmaster:
does anyone else ever get those sudden urges to clean out and reorganize your entire room at 3am
